I need to get my hair cut, but I don’t know which places are reputable in the area. If you could direct me, then I would be very grateful.
Dear SPLIT ENDS,
I’m glad you asked this question. You might be surprised to learn—seeing as I wear a helmet all day every day—what a stickler I am regarding quality hair care. This will give me a real chance to be a resource to students. Now, I am making a couple assumptions based on your question. First, because you’ve called yourself SPLIT ENDS, I’m assuming you’re a female student. Secondly, given the fact that you’re just getting around to asking about this at the end of the year, I’m assuming you’re the girl I’ve seen walking around campus with her hair tied around her waist to keep from tripping over it.
Luckily for you, I have lived here long enough and am fetching enough to have had amorous relationships with a fair share of Bloomington-Normal women—and this has provided me a vast knowledge of the operating salons in the greater Bloomington-Normal area.
From my perspective, you have four real choices:
1) TM Hair Design
2) Jenni’s Salon
3) Fox & Hounds Day Spa
4) Go on living like the Wolf Man, frightening children and crying yourself to sleep
I trust you will make a sound decision, SPLIT ENDS. And if you find my advice helpful, tell your friends to keep e-mailing me with questions. I bore easily.