Tribute
Posted in Uncategorized on Dec 5th, 2007
Tribute by David Borst
Remembrances are as much about the person who is
remembering as they are about the person being
remembered. Our remembrances of John are no
different. John was woven into the fabric of our
lives with the rest of the Matthews family. We knew
the Matthews long before John was even a twinkle in
Jim’s eye, having met them when Courtney and our son
Doug met in a pre-kindergarten school. A chance
invitation to play provided the fertile soil for our
friendship, which grew stronger as our children grew
older and we became fast friends. John’s arrival
brought joy but also challenges and his entire family
met these challenges in a marvelous way. We felt
privileged to watch them enfold John in their lives.
The Matthews children often visited at our house, the
kids enjoyed being together. Frankly, we have no idea
what chaos ensued when our children visited the
Mathews – and it’s probably best that we don’t. But
we can attest to the havoc that occurred when
Courtney, Russell, John and Rocket descended on ours –
and the good times began. The volume suddenly went up
to high, the cats scattered (not to be seen for the
duration of their stay), the screen door banging
incessantly as kids/dogs went out, went in, and went
out again. When John was very young he often ended up
sans pants at some point; we still remember those pink
little buns racing up the back stairs to look for the
cats that had long since ’gotten out of Dodge’.
Sometimes he would play with the other kids; often he
was happier playing by himself. He found his favorite
things and industriously assembled them – the ceramic
dog in the hall, the iron pig, the Brahman bull under
the piano, the stuffed penguin in Ali’s room. He knew
just where they all were and he would line ’em all
up in a row.
We have many rich memories of time with the Mathews.
Many Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas dinners,
where John taught me that a fine meal always had LOTS
of mashed potatoes (and only Jim knew how to mash them
the right way) and LOTS of ice cream (an insight that
I already had, but didn’t mind having reinforced).
Long walks after too much food, with John racing
ahead. John curled up with Jim for a ‘post-prandial’
snooze on the couch. A visit from the Matthews one
summer when we were on Cape Cod – John swimming at
Stoney Beach, walking through our flower garden,
eating ice cream at Ben and Bill’s. Life was good.
If a poem is like a person, then surely a person’s
life is like a poem. I think John’s life-poem was
elegant and graceful – filled with the joys of
laughter, loving, and being loved. Gary Snyder once
wrote that when man and nature are in harmony, we will
always have ripe blackberries to eat and a sunny spot
under a pine tree to sit. And this is how we imagine
John: He is sitting in a sunny spot under a pine
tree, laughing and eating ripe blackberries –
certainly with lots of ice cream. And with such
thoughts and memories, life is still good.